Ode to Obi-Wan

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Ode to Obi-Wan

(from “Star Wars: A Forced Musical”)

aired on the Dr Demento Thanksgiving show Nov 18, 2017 (click for info)

Illustrations by K. Woo
Lyrics and Voice by Joe J Thomas
Copyright 2017 Joe J Thomas, Joe’s Dump
www.JoesDump.com
Not a Quinn-Martin Production

~~~ Lyrics ~~~
Ode to Obi-Wan
(from “Star Wars: A Forced Musical”)
Written by: Joe J Thomas

Oh my father was full of midichlorians they say
That’s why the force in me is so hot
I’d go out in my speeder shootin’ womp rats all day
But now tell me what have I got?

If you’re gonna be a Jedi
You wanna have a dead eye
With a saber or blaster gun
But you gotta have a master
When you’re headed for disaster
Oh the man that you want’s Obi-Wan

He’s a guy who knew your father
But don’t you go and bother
Asking what dear ole’ dad become
Cuz you might be relater
To someone named Darth Vader
No you can’t trust that old Obi-Wan

Obi-Wan! Obi-Wan!
Did you know that he trained Anakin?

If you’re the type of mister
Who’d go and kiss his sister
And fly round with a guy named Han
Get your butt to Dagobah
You gotta train with Yoda
See the ghost of your friend, meet your paw in the end
But it all began with Obi-Wan

If you sneak into the Death Star
And your Jedi skills are sub-par
All your friends will be suffer-un
You could lose a hand to daddy
See a sarlaac eat a baddy
Have a trash bin squeezin’ your buns

You may meet in a cantina
With a ugly dude who’s meaner
Than a Wookie with fleas by gum
Or hear ghosts in your X-Wing
Say your nav comp is a bad thing
Never watch movies three, two, or one

Obi-Wan! Obi-Wan!
Get the heck out my head Obi-Wan!

If you’re knocked out by a Wampa
Or stuffed into a Ton-ton
Win a race on the Kessel run
Defeat an evil empire
Then dance around a campfire
Carbonite, Saber Fight, Ewoks might die of fright
Heck you might even see Obi-Wan

All content written and voiced by Joe J Thomas online at: JoeActor.com

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Henderson and Havner: episode 24!

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Henderson and Havner, episode 24 – “It’s Exactly Who You Suspected”

Henderson and Havner


In today’s episode:

Just who’s behind Los Angeles’s crippling footwear crime wave? And who is the Marauding Marauder? And do we really trust H&H to figure all that out? *** SEASON 3 FINALE! ***

Listen to episode 24 of this exclusive series from Pendant Productions:

      HandH24master

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Trump Feelings via Dr Otto

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My Feelings on Trump, as Expressed by Dr. Otto

Only the amazing Jim Varney as Dr. Otto can truly sum up my feelings about Donald Trump:

Treat yourself! Be sure to Buy or Rent “Dr. Otto and the Riddle of the Gloom Beam” on Amazon here!

Bonus!!! Watch my review of “Dr. Otto”, and “Captain Invincible” here:

 

All content written and voiced by Joe J Thomas online at: JoeActor.com

 

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Henderson and Havner: episode 23!

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Henderson and Havner, episode 23 – “The Status Quo Returns”

Henderson and Havner


In today’s episode:

H&H get their snoop on with Captain and Chiefy, and uncover surprising information! Also Dr. Anderson is around for some reason.

Listen to episode 23 of this exclusive series from Pendant Productions:

      HandH23master

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Henderson and Havner: episode 22!

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Henderson and Havner, episode 22 – “A Short Tropical Interlude”

Henderson and Havner


In today’s episode:

What could possibly ruin the perfect honeymoon? The stars of our show, of course.

Listen to episode 22 of this exclusive series from Pendant Productions:

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Henderson and Havner: episode 21!

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Henderson and Havner, episode 21 – “Left in Limbo”

Henderson and Havner


In today’s episode:

H and H present their evidence, but the Interims’ response isn’t what they expected!

Listen to episode 21 of this exclusive series from Pendant Productions:

      HandH21master

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Henderson and Havner: episode 20!

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Henderson and Havner, episode 20 – “Bots and Boots”

Henderson and Havner


In today’s episode:

A field trip to a nearby factory gives H and H all the clues they need… or does it?

Listen to episode 20 of this exclusive series from Pendant Productions:

      HandH20master

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Sillyam Fakespeare

Gallery

This gallery contains 12 photos.

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Sillyam Fakespeare Yea, verily! Tis time for some newly minted sayings by the immortal bard’s third cousin, thrice removed… Odds bodkins! Milady most assuredly has a plethora of junk in thine trunk! Seldom is a man so forlorn than when … Continue reading

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Henderson and Havner: episode 19!

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Henderson and Havner, episode 19 – “Reductive Reasoning”

Henderson and Havner


In today’s episode:

H and H get a taste of their own medicine as the Interims up the pressure!

Listen to episode 19 of this exclusive series from Pendant Productions:

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Political Opinions

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Political Opinions

In a recent Facebook post, people were debating the merits and issues with stating your political views on a public forum. The primary concern seemed to be how it might affect their business. Here is my posted reply:

Now is not the time to remain silent. No job, paycheck or client is worth giving up our freedoms. And that’s what’s at stake. Everyone must do what they’re comfortable with, but I will not stand idly by while the underpinnings of our nation are eroded. If anyone, including a client, doesn’t like my stance on issues of this importance then I wouldn’t want them anyway. So far, I’ve only lost one connection here, and he went way off the deep end. My two cents. Your mileage may vary.

After all, what good is having the right to freedom of speech if you never exercise it?

The Role of the Jester
Although I do speak my mind plainly at times, I also often use humor to convey messages. Like the King’s Jester, some truths are easier to deliver with a bit of comedy. The laughter (or lack thereof) can tell you a lot about the audience. And make no mistake – I’ve mocked both sides of the political aisle (but one side is usually a lot more of a comedy gold mine 😉 )

Here are my latest set of short historical propaganda films – Enjoy!

Join The Republican Party: The Party of THE FUTURE!

Dead Presidents on Trump (5 short videos)
What would dead presidents have to say about Donald J. Trump?
Wonder no more!
Here’s 10-15 seconds each of alternative history for you!




Copyright 2017 Joe’s Dump
www.JoesDump.com
Not a Quinn-Martin Production

 

All content written and voiced by Joe J Thomas online at: JoeActor.com

 

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