Mooseferatu: Midnight of the Elk

Mooseferatu: Midnight of the Elk (Joe's Dump)

(an original winter’s poem by Joe J Thomas)

Gather round, my calves, and you shall hear
A chilling tale of dread and fear
When day turns to night and you hear a deep “Mooooooo”!
Outside in the dark roams Mooseferatu!

He walks through the bog with his antlers aglow
A frightening sight that few shall dare know
For those who aren’t careful, he jumps from the trees
They shout in sheer terror and fall to their knees

Above all he looms – seven feet at the shoulder
Just seeing his shadow will make you feel colder
The wings on his back, sharp fangs in his mouth
There’s no use in running to the north or the south

If lady luck stands by you this winter’s night
Perhaps you’ll escape the horrible sight
Some say he’s a myth, a legend or lore
They whisper it quietly while barring the door

So when you go out in winter’s cold chill
Be certain you are wary behind every hill
Keep to the highlands – don’t go down below
Or risk Mooseferatu’s dark mournful lowe!


All content written and voiced by Joe J Thomas online at:



MatriXmas: Jingle Bells


MatriXmas: Jingle Bells

Original Lyrics to “Jingles Bells” + Spybreak! by Propellerheads = MatriXmas

A non-original song parody from Joe’s Dump!

Time for some Holiday METAL that’s not tinsel …



      MatriXmas: Jingle Bells by Joe's Dump

MatriXmas: Jingle Bells by Joe's Dump
~~~ Lyrics ~~~
MatriXmas: Jingle Bells
(Jingle Bells lyrics set to Spybreak! by Propellerheads)
by Joe J Thomas of Joe’s Dump

…Santa needs a ride.

[Verse 1]
Dashing through the snow
In a one-horse open sleigh
O’er the fields we go
Laughing all the way
Bells on bobtails ring
Making spirits bright
What fun it is to ride and sing
A sleighing song tonight

Jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Oh what fun it is to ride
In a one-horse open sleigh, hey
Jingle bells, jingle bells
Jingle all the way
Oh what fun it is to ride
In a one-horse open sleigh

…Frosty Snowballs
…Winter Warlock

[Verse 2]
A day or two ago
I thought I’d take a ride
And soon, Miss Fanny Bright
Was seated by my side
The horse was lean and lank
Misfortune seemed his lot
He got into a drifted bank
And then we got upsot


…Kringle down your Chimney
…Bumbles Bounce

[Verse 3]
A day or two ago
The story I must tell
I went out on the snow
And on my back I fell
A gent was riding by
In a one-horse open sleigh
He laughed as there I sprawling lie
But quickly drove away


…Burgermeister Meisterburger
…I want to be a dentist

[Verse 4]
Now the ground is white
Go it while you’re young
Take the girls tonight
And sing this sleighing song
Just get a bobtailed bay
Two forty as his speed
Hitch him to an open sleigh
And crack, you’ll take the lead

… Jingle my Bells
… Open Sleigh
… Hey!


All content written and voiced by Joe J Thomas online at:



Political Artwork


This gallery contains 22 photos.


Political Artwork Over the last 3+ years, I’ve been, uh… inspired? driven? annoyed? … to create a number of Political Artwork pieces. Some are graphics, some songs, posts, etc. Below, in random order, are some of the graphic ones. Maybe … Continue reading


The Power of Voice Over – Part II


The Power of Voice Over – Part II

Time for another slightly altered commercial!

As voice actors, we often get caught up in the process, and forget the impact that our voices can have on a production.

I’ve been seeing a new commercial for United Health Care and AARP with people navigating a hedge maze aptly named “Navigate the Medicare Maze with UnitedHealthcare”.

I wondered how much the feel of the commercial could be changed just by adding some background voices (aka. “Walla”). Aside from the new Walla, everything else (video, music) is the same.

Here’s my take on the commercial: “Beware! The Medicare Maze!”

… and for your reference, the original is here:

What other ways could you interpret this spot? How can your voice breath life into the productions you’re involved in?

Stay creative, my friends!

P.S. Here’s the first commercial I altered “Olivia’s Evil Wish”

The Power of Voice Over


All content written and voiced by Joe J Thomas online at:



The IMDb 100 Club


The IMDb 100 Club

My IMDb listing stands at 99 credits.

Joe J Thomas - IMDB 99 - JoeActor
Joe’s IMDb Listing (click here to see)

I may pass 100 this year.

Now, those of you who know me might recall that I’m not very hot on awards.
So let’s call this a Milestone instead.

Rituals and Milestones. Rites of Passage.

Although it doesn’t change how I pursue my career, it is nice to see some measure of real-world progress.

What are your personal Milestones?

What things in your career help you to appreciate the strides and progress you’ve made?


All content written and voiced by Joe J Thomas online at:



The Impossible VO Machine!


The Impossible VO Machine!

Is it possible to build a silent, portable DAW that’s powerful enough for gaming?

That was my quest… and I’m up and running on that impossible system!


  • Light Weight
  • Portable
  • Silent
  • Digital Audio Workstation (DAW)
  • Powerful Enough for Gaming

Selecting the Components
I decided to start with silent and portable. For that, I’d need a fanless laptop with enough power to record and edit audio without getting bogged down. That narrowed the field quite a bit. Aside from Chromebooks and tablets, there were only a few machines that met my specs.

Dell XPS-13 2 in 1 Laptop
I chose the “Dell XPS 13 2 in 1” for the base system. Please note: only the 2 in 1 model is fanless and truly silent when running. Very important when I’m in the booth. It also has 2 USB-C Thunderbolt ports, which will come into play for the next parts of the “Impossible VO Machine”.

To handle the demands of a true gaming box, I’d need a higher power graphics card than any silent laptop could offer. For this, I researched External Graphics Processing Units (aka: eGPU). They’re basically a high-end graphics card with a power supply and fans in a separate box. Most also require a high-speed interface. This is where the Thunderbolt ports come into play.

Aorus GTX-1070 Gaming Box
I chose the “Gigabyte AORUS Gaming Box 1070” with an included Nvidia graphics card built in. It works best with machines where the Thunderbolt port runs directly to the main processor (as opposed to thru the chooser). The laptop I picked is just such a machine.

With all the essential components in place, I still needed some additional ones to round out the system.

Plugable USB-C Docking Station
The “Plugable USB-C Triple Display Docking Station” works through the Thunderbolt port to provide power and adds usb ports and external monitor interfaces for daily use.

I already had an external HDMI display, USB hub, wireless mouse and keyboard.

Add to that the audio components (Focusrite Scarlet 2i2 interface, microphone, monitors) and the total package was complete.

Using The Impossible VO Machine
For my daily use as a DAW, I’ve got the USB hub connected to the USB-C port, with connections to the mouse/keyboard, Focusrite, etc. The USB-C Thunderbolt port is connected to the Plugable docking stations, which provides power and access to the external monitor. When recording, I use Sony Sound Forge and Sony Music Studio. Video editing is done with Sony Movie Studio. The system runs like a champ. Silent and powerful.

When I want to do some gaming, I disconnect the Plugable docking station, and plug the Aorus Gaming Box into the Thunderbolt port. It also provides power to the system and connects to the larger external monitor for gaming. The fans are not bad, although too loud for recording. But the eGPU has more than enough power to run all the games I’ve tried so far without lagging behind. Truly awesome!

I’ve also used the eGPU when editing video and rendering animation. It really cuts down on the time needed by taking the load off of the laptop cpu for any graphics operations.

To switch back to DAW mode, I need to select “Disconnect GPU” from the tray app, then swap the Aorus out and plug the Plugable dock back in. Very easy to do.

No system, especially one with this number of components, is without problems. Early on, the Dell Laptop had 2 issues that I’ve found work-arounds for. The first has to do with using Hibernation mode. Dell was initially not happy with it, and would periodically shut down without notice when in Hibernation. I managed to find a fix for that online that involves clearing out the old Hibernation data.

The second issue was more problematic for recording. The laptop internal speakers would sometimes make burbling noises even when nothing was playing. I suspect this has to do with a driver or design issue. Since first purchasing the system, there have been several driver updates. This seems to have corrected the problem. Should it re-occur, I did find a work-around: just disable the internal speakers. (I wasn’t using them anyway – just my monitors and headphones).

So… “The Impossible VO Machine” proved to be quite possible. There are some compromises, but that is always the case. The pricing for all the components is also higher than a normal DAW. Overall, I’m very happy with the end result. It allows me to record, travel, and game… all on one system.


All content written and voiced by Joe J Thomas online at:



Battle With Me!


Battle With Me!

As I type this, my back is not comfortable. That’s generous, since I needed a cane to get out of bed this morning.

But I’m not complaining. I’ve been here before. And I’m not giving in or giving up.

Everyone has problems. Some are of our own making. Others are just the unluck of the draw. Either way, it’s our choice how we deal with these issues.

I choose to do battle… Won’t you join me?

Battle With Me! 55 YO JoeActor

This Is My 55

I’m far from perfect.

I battle depression,
been overweight,
intestinal issues,
back problems…

Fuck all that.

It’s not stopping me.

Do the work.
Get help.
You can succeed.

Battle With Me!

(the sword’s name is “Lobera”)


All content written and voiced by Joe J Thomas online at:



The Genius of Donald J. Trump


The Genius of Donald J. Trump

Those of you who know me probably aren’t used to hearing anything positive about Trump.

However, there is something that he seems to do better than anyone else. His “Genius” trait.

Trump never explains anything he says or does. He lets others do it for him.

Can it be that simple? Is this the key to his success?

Republicans in government and his supporters constantly “explain” what he means when he does or says something stupid, ignorant, racist, weak, etc.

His detractors “explain” what is wrong with him. Mentally. Strategically. They even try to figure out if he’s “playing 3-dimensional chess”… and in doing so, freely give him his next move to make.

His lawyers “explain” away his legal problems.

His accountants “explain” away his money problem.

And behind it all, Trump explains nothing. Ever. No apologies. No explanations. No reason for his insane, bizarre, mental meltdowns and verbal diatribes. Nada.

And why should he explain anything he does or says? He’s got all of us doing it for him.

He is, in essence, the Schrödinger’s cat of politicians: simultaneously a “Stable Genius” and a “Babbling Imbecile”.

And so he shall remain until the box is flung open…

Trump Genius combo JoesDump


All content written and voiced by Joe J Thomas online at:


America: Sorry For Your Loss


America: Sorry For Your Loss

America: Sorry For Your Loss

Sorry For Your Loss

(Morals, Intelligence, Fairness, Culture, Sanity, World Standing, Children, Laws, Soul, Planet, etc…)

Get Well Soon

I’ve decided this will be my new greeting to fellow Americans. I really hope I don’t need to use it for very long…

But to be honest, both sides of this horror story are losing so much. But the difference is that one side knows what it’s losing. And the other remains terribly clueless.

It would be easy to call names. Stupid. Conned. Racist. But many are just ignorant. And the cure for that is education. Another thing sadly lacking in our country.

And those who refuse to listen? Who don’t want to know?

“Willful Ignorance” is far worse than any amount of stupidity.

Time to get out of our bubbles. See ourselves and “the other”. Mend the wounds. Heal the divide.

But I’m not holding my breath.

Stay sane out there.



All content written and voiced by Joe J Thomas online at: