Once per week, come rain or shine
I make up something new
Perhaps a chicken measuring line
Or which foot goes in which shoe
Henderson is always fun
(and maybe a little crass)
For poetry there’s more than one
To fill a poet’s glass
Sometimes it’s nothing that I have in mind
I let it out with glee
Cartoons and music of different kinds
Collide in obscurity
Quantum physics or science now
They both have places here
Artwork featuring a cow
Is neither here nor there
Politics and opinions rage
Obama, Snowden, and Trump
Don’t lock them all up in a cage
The belong here in the Dump
Another thing the dump provides
Each Monday without fail
A reason to open my mind and eyes
To tell a simple tale
And so I challenge each of you
Create something for the world
It might be gold. It might be poo.
Let your freaky flag unfurl!
The lines are of the exact same size
They rhyme
Or not
Sometimes two, or three, or four
Will fall upon the floor
Images of dogs
Vegetables fry and fly without a care in the garden
And then I stopped typing
Great Great Aunt Agatha Kensington
My family has a secretive past
Of memories haunting the best of ‘em
From the first of us to the very last
About Great Great Aunt Agatha Kensington
poetry by Joe J Thomas
I wanna be a moose
And wander through the woods
I’d munch on marshy grasses
And do what mooses should
With my moose wife at my side
A couple kids in tow
We’d amble in the forest
Until the evening glow
The lure of lights would call us
To visit your backyard
To nibble at your gardens
Without the slightest regard
After a dip into the pool
Your kitchen is our aim
There’s leftovers in the fridge
And a dog that we can blame
In the morning you awake
To find us in your den
The families are asleep
All the mooses and the men
I see you standing on the stairs
And give a moosey “Hello!”
But you don’t speak our language
So out the door we go
Back to the woods with kids behind
Reluctantly we leave
But don’t despair; we will return
Some other summer’s eve
a short poem by Joe J Thomas
in honor of holidays in California, 2015
It’s one week after Halloween
No chill is in the air
With temperatures in the eighties
And skies sunny and fair
Although the tinseled trees displayed
At stores across the town
I just can’t feel the spirit
With two months counting down
Each year the holidays come sooner
I’m pretty sure we’ll see
December having fireworks
And May with Christmas trees
So here’s a plan that I’ll enact
I hope you’ll follow suit
All holidays are on my house
From the basement to the roof
St Nick is on the rooftop
Skeletons by the street
The Easter Bunny’s in the yard
With Dreidels by his feet
A Leprechaun is by the fountain
With American flags in his gold
The New Year’s baby crawls on the porch
And a turkey leg he holds
With all the other holidays
Displayed around my house
The grass will wither soon and die
That’s good news for the drought!
Shopping for socks. Why is it that whatever ones I buy always seem to grab my toes like some boa constrictor? Are my feet abnormally long or something? I mean, I know my second toe is longer than the big toe. That’s normal, right? Based on sock manufacturers, I have to conclude that everyone just has smaller feet than me. Or they’re fine with their feet being bound, unable to wiggle their toes.
Shopping for a sofa. Why is it that whatever sofa I sit on, the seat is always way too deep? It’s the perfect depth between being an actual couch, and a couch with an ottoman. I guess I could buy some throw pillows so my back can actually touch something when my feet are on the floor. Maybe that’s it! It’s a conspiracy between the couch makers union and the throw pillow makers union. (checks online for throw pillow makers union) Nope. I guess that’s not it. I guess I just have to conclude that everyone else has longer femurs than I do.
So, to all of the long-legged, short-footed people buying stuff out there… Congratulations! You’ve flooded the market with your merchandise and I can’t find anything!
Now then, on to more important matters.
Why are my sleeves always so long?!?!?!?
Fiverr Ten
A desperate guy named Ted
Wrote a Fiverr ad which read:
“For five bucks I’ll voice”
“Whatever’s your choice”
“And for ten you’ll get breakfast in bed!”
DAW, Doh!
Is your system a Mac or PC?
AIF, WAV, MP3?
When you’re starting VO
It’s important to know
What’s better? Protools or Adobe?
Re: Union
The union will give you a say
As a group we have more sway Continue reading
I am immortal.
Well, at least my data is.
Blog posts, emails, social media…
Videos, photos, and audio recordings.
Government and industry data.
Medical and financial records.
Radio and TV broadcast around the earth and into space.
How much will be left after I’ve gone?
And yet…
Before any of these technological marvels.
It was the memory of family and friends where one lingered.
That’s still true today.
I think I may prefer that to immortality.
Conspiracy from the halls of power
Governments, Religions, Industries
They meet in secret
Secured in VPN tunneled chats
In person at clandestine locations
Guarded by muscle, money and technology
The powerful ones decide
Which Conspiracy Theory to foster
Keep the masses busy… Preoccupied
Angry at something, or someone else
Like jingling the keys in front of an infant
We watch, and talk, and argue
While they do whatever they want
And they get away with it
Because we are easily led
Conspiracy Theories
Terrorists, Vaccines, UFOs, Planetary Alignment
They push them out to the publicity machine
Like drug dealers to the junkies
And the truth is buried under a mountain of meaningless noise
This is my Conspiracy Theory Conspiracy Theory
