Spain: Witness Protection Program

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Spain: Witness Protection Program

Since I’ve been in Spain, I’ve uncovered a deep plot to relocate mascots from the USA. I suspect the CIA is involved, in cooperation with local Spanish government officials.

For decades, the USA and Spain have been hiding mascots in their Witness Protection Program. Joe’s Dump blows the lid on this exclusive story!

The evidence is sparse, but here’s what I have so far…

Mr. Clean aka “Don Limpio

Mr. Clean

Mr. Clean

Don Limpio

Don Limpio

This guy’s pretty bold. Same line of work, same look. I’m surprised he hasn’t been apprehended yet, but it seems his record is squeaky clean. To his credit, he’s changed a bunch of times: aka “Mr. Proper” aka “Maestro Limpio” aka “Mastro Lindo” aka “Meister Proper” aka “Pan Proper” aka “Mister Proper” aka “M. Net” aka “Monsieur Propre”

Laughing Cow aka “La Vaca Que Ríe

Laughing Cow

Laughing Cow

La Vaca Que Ríe

La Vaca Que Ríe

You’d be laughing too if you got to be pampered like this cow. A little hard to spot, but I think she got a nose job with the relocation.

Spongebob Squarepants aka “Bob Esponja

Spongebob Squarepants

Spongebob Squarepants

Bob Esponja

Bob Esponja

Evidence is a bit sketchy. Could only find an artist’s rendering on SBSP.

Buzz “Honeynut” Bee aka “(Abeja) Miel Pops

Buzz "Honeynut" Bee

Buzz “Honeynut” Bee

(Abeja) Miel Pops

(Abeja) Miel Pops

Easily the best disguise of the bunch. Plastic surgery, new outfit, plus… glasses. Even moved from one company to another. Top notch work by the operatives on this one.

Conclusion:
… I’m not sure where this rabbit hole will eventually lead, but if you tell anyone I told you, I’ll deny everything.

You’ve been warned.

— José Basurero

 

All content written and voiced by Joe J Thomas online at: JoeActor.com

 

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