Crabby McCrankyPants

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Crabby McCrankyPants

A short poem (and apology to my wife), by Joe J Thomas

Why is the kitty being so jingly?
Is that why my nerves are ever so tingly?
Amplified noise assaulting my head
Prevents me from sleeping all snug in my bed
I snap. I growl. I grumble and snipe.
I rage. I cuss. I howl and I gripe.
The pressure is mounting – it’s all in my noggin
I need to say “Sorry!”, which is why I am bloggin
Oh, Wifey! You know, it is not your fault.
You try to be kind, and not to assault.
Tempermental I am when a new show is a brewing
But Crabby McCrankyPants – him I should be eschewing
Accept my apology, and I promise to you
It won’t happen again… until the next show is due!

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Walking The Earth

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Walking The Earth

KeepOnTruckin2

Exercise as a way of life…

My wife and I like to walk. It’s our daily bit of exercise every morning together. We also work out in other ways, but the walking has become our “thing”. We even have technology to help us measure and keep goals.  I’ve got the Nike FuelBand, and my wife has a FitBit One.
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Big Jim McBob’s Cowboy Musings

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Big Jim McBob’s Cowboy Musings

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Howdy, buckaroos!

My name’s Big Jim McBob. Seems like folks are always asking me to speechify on things, so to help ‘em out, this here’s Big Jim McBob’sCowboy Musings“.

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Joe Promos!

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Joe J Thomas of JoeActor.com is proud to introduce a new chapter in his career:

JoePromos.com

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Director and Mentor: Joyce Castellanos
Engineer and Spirit Guide: Gene Cordes
Produced and Rocked! by: Chuck Duran (DemosThatRock.com)
Special Guest Stars: My Wife and Marc Cashman

The story behind this demo:

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Stupid Jokes

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Stupid Jokes (’nuff said…)

… read ’em, laugh (optional), and add your own in the comments!

 

q) what do you call a man who has inherited his father’s world-wide chicken broth empire?
a) a bouillon-aire

 

q) did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side amputated?
a) he’s all right now

 

q) you know what happened when I ate at a Chinese German fusion restaurant?
a) an hour later I was hungry for power

 

q) how many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?
a) two… but don’t ask me how they got in there

 

q) why was six afraid of seven?
a) because seven ate nine

 

q) what did the news report when a dwarf psychic escaped from jail?
a) small medium at large

 

q) what did the bartender say when a horse walked in?
a) hey buddy, why the long face?

 

q) how do you get down from an elephant?
a) you don’t – you get down from a goose

 

q) why did the bike fall over?
a) it was two tired

 

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Broses! Flowers for MEN! (Henderson episode 2)

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Broses – Flowers for MEN!

Henderson Moment Episode 2:

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Broses! Flowers for MEN!

Broses! Flowers for MEN!

Hello folks. My name’s Henderson, and this is my Moment.

Henderson International Products (aka “HIP”) now brings you guys a brand new thing you can buy for other guys. But in a totally manly way!
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The Super Foods!

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The Super Foods!

… the following audio is dedicated to my lovely wife:

(enjoy!)

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The Super Foods!

The Super Foods!

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When Did You Stop Doing Your Job?

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When Did You Stop Doing Your Job?

(an open rant to those who view coaching as the apex of all careers)

Q: How is a Free VO Conference Call like a Free Vacation at a Time Share?
A: (c’mon, you already know the answer!)

I dunno about you, but one of my current pet peeves it the sheer volume of advertising I am deluged with by folks trying to sell me their coaching services. Continue reading

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Ode To Hair

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Ode To Hair

an original poem by Joe J Thomas

It’s on my arm here while I write
It’s on the cat who’s curled up tight
In a brush and on the floor
Swept away beneath the door
A balding patch or flowing locks
I think I found some in my socks
It covers squirrels, dogs and voles
There’s just a bit here on my mole
Growing forth from follicles
A lack can bring much ridicule
Wet, dry, dirty, clean
You all know just what I mean
Splitting hairs, the hairy eye
Hairy palms on werewolf guy
Dye, perm, trim, and curl
Piled high on a pretty girl
Styles come and styles go
And so does hair – that’s all I know

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